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Muchene

May 18, 2012
14:36
Prezzo and Goldie are for sho for shizzo!
» ‎ Muchene

So it’s getting really hott in the Big Brother house. After their altercation, DKB and Prezzo have been joined at the hip, literally! Big Brother punished them for their childish misdemeanor by ordering the two warring personalities to wear a jump suit that is conjoined at the hip. Guess that will teach them who is the real gangsta in the house!

Meanwhile this joining at the hip has not stopped the bubbling love affair between Prez and First Lady Goldie. The two are still massively flirting with each other and it seems only a matter of time before they do it like rabbits. Prez sang to Goldie his hit song “for sho for shizzo” as Goldie lapped up the attention. This is bound to be one sizzlin’ Naija-Kenya collabo. This couple has TMS- Too Much Swag!

Needless to mention there was one girl with a melon-sized kiwaru in the house and that is none other than Barbz. The attention seeking diva was clearly not happy with Goldie getting all the attention. She is doing her best to hide it but everyone can see that she does not like the status quo, she wants to be the top female in the house! She is really playing out that woiye card.
May 14, 2012
16:40
Prezzo goes H.A.M. on Barbz!
» ‎ Muchene

You know what they say about competitions, either go hard or go home? Well, Prezzo came down hard on Barbz about her age just after midnight. Just when we thought the two had smoked the peace pipe, Prezzo mocked Barbz about not having a family or a career at a very mature 34 years old.

He claimed that Barbz was in denial and had to be real with herself and leave the House to work on getting married and having kids before she turns 35. That’s the “go home” bit right there!

Prezzo went on to brag about his wife and daughter and how Kenya was behind him all the way, which he claimed was not the case for Barbz. Poor Barbz just sat there, feeling woiye for herself and tried to take the heat off herself by sarcastically cheering Prezzo on as he dissected her.

"Go Prezzo, go Prezzo," she said as she listened to Prezzo tear her apart.

And as if that was not enough, Prezzo went on the attack yet again. After Barbz opened up to the girls about what Prezzo had said to her at night, Goldie and Mampi took it upon themselves to talk to him.

Barbz told the girls that she'd only cook for six people because Prezzo had also dissed her food! Damn! Old, single, no family and a hopeless cook…that is way below the belt Prez!

Meanwhile, Goldie insisted to Prezzo that he was offline and had to apologize to Barbz for being nasty to her. Goldie added that Barbz was the hottest girl in Upville but Prezzo clearly refused that vybe. After seeing that Goldie would not back off, Prezzo agreed to apologize to Barbz but when Mampi approached him, he went to town about how Barbz deserved it.

Mampi agreed with Prezzo and it wasn't long before Mampi and Prezzo were giggling and being BFFs at the expense of Barbz. Prezzo added that he knew that was he said to Barbz wasn't right but; "When I ask myself did she deserve it? Yes she did."
May 09, 2012
20:20
Kenyan guy gets stuck inside cheating wife!
» ‎ Muchene

I'm struggling to write this story, cause of laughing, crying, clutching my aching ribs... These have to be the clowns of 2012! Some guy was caught on camera cheating with someone's wife in the worst possible way. The dude was literally caught dipping into the 'cookie jar' as he got stuck inside the mama and couldn't come out. As in, the cops were even called to help the man get unstuck.
"Kijana habari? Iko shida gani tukusaidie?"
"Zungusha pande ile.."
But lo, poor Kennedy was still stuck in Muthoni. It took a preacher to come and pray for the guys to come undone!
You just have to watched the video of this poor soul. Hands down, this beats any Naija movie! {youtube}gEABw7dz1N0{/youtube} {plusone}
May 02, 2012
13:34
African Beauty: Uganda
» ‎ Muchene

We are going on with our mission at muchene. Just which African country has the sexiest women? Last time round we had Ethiopia and the response from ya’ll was a very positive “Hell Yes.” It will take a lot to outdo that piece but we believe this continent has too many fine and sexy women.

Now, it was suggested that should do this by region just to have a real competition here. This is how we will do this. We will do East, West, North and Southern Africa. And since we started with Ethiopia, Eastern Africa will get us underway. And this week we go to Uganda….

The landlocked country certainly has sexiness on lock down

Never mind that heavy Ugandan accent, look at this

I bet KQ will be overwhelmed with the number of Kenyan guys heading there this week

And how do you talk of Ugandan beauty without mentioning the lovely Juliana Kinyamozi

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April 27, 2012
12:41
Totally Sick
» ‎ Muchene

I thought we had seen it all with the Nyeri sutra saga here in our motherland Kenya, but ooh my words what is happening in Eygpt is just down right unbelievable! Egyptian husbands will soon be legally allowed to have sex with their dead wives for up to six hours after their death, local media reports. The controversial new law is claimed to be part of a raft of measures being introduced by the Islamist-dominated parliament. It will also see the minimum age of marriage lowered to 14 and the ridding of women's rights of getting education and employment.
The subject of a husband having sex with his dead wife arose in May 2011 when Moroccan cleric Zamzami Abdul Bari said marriage remains valid even after death.Although reported in local media, there are some suggestions from within Egypt that the plans do not exist and were merely seeded by journalists loyal to ousted President Hosni Mubarak.

Source: http://www.dailymail.co.uk {plusone}
April 18, 2012
10:36
Guys, Is your woman still too childish?
» ‎ Muchene

One can only wonder what Britney Spears meant with that whole, “I’m not a girl, not yet a woman.” Then what exactly are you Brit? I will tell you what you are…high on drugs! Well, as for our Kenyan ladies we can always safely place them in one of the two categories. Here is how you know that you are still a girl, not yet a woman:

You Spend Money On Things You Don’t Need and Wonder Why You’re Broke

I know this chic can’t wait to get her salo. The reckless spender buys a new pair of shoes or a bag just because.We all want to ball until we fall, but not everyone has cash like that. Start jazzing up what’s in your closet and doing your own personal maintenance and stop looking for an excuse to buy a new dress, the most expensive hair, to get your nails done every other week and to buy hundreds of Made in China designer bags. Treat yourself occasionally dear, not daily. GROW UP!

You Drop Your Kids Off With Other People Regularly

While there are a great deal of women out there who skip the clubs and all the big fun to stay indoors and be with their kids, there are too many who don’t. Just because you had a child doesn’t automatically make you grown, especially when your mother, your sister, your aunt and everyone but you is seeing them, feeding them and more. And please don’t be one of those women that passes your child to other people on the regular so you can go everywhere but to work, but because you’re not getting along with the child’s father, he’s the one person not allowed to see the kid. That’s not cool and that’s not grown up behaviour. GROW UP!

You’re Still Getting Caught Up in the Group or Mob Mentality

If you’re out of college by now and still can’t seem to think for yourself, you’re not a grown woman. You can’t be, you lil’ girlie. Not with that crew of loud chics at the club talking openly about their men and bedroom matters. This also goes for the girl that gets with her friends and talks dirty about people she doesn’t know because that’s what her girlfriends are doing: If you were still in high school trying to be in the in-crowd it might be understandable, but you’re too grown for this now. GROW UP!

You Deal With Things in a Passive Aggressive Manner

It’s okay to be mad about something and to let your feelings be known in a calm manner. By all means, go ahead. But the problem is when you express your feelings about something that happened so long ago, you can barely remember the details–and neither can the person you’re angry with. If you have beef, it’s always the best idea to let someone know immediately that they hurt your feelings. Wait too long to open your mouth about it and you come off as petty, and sadly, you probably won’t get any sympathy for that altercation that happened like five months ago.

Your Focus When It Comes to Dating Is Based Around What Someone Else Has

If someone asks this chic what she’s looking for in a man, money seems to be the root of all her answers. He needs to have this, she needs to be well taken care of, blah, blah, blah. Money is great, but if you’re quick to dismiss or won’t date a guy who can’t take baths in money because he had to pay bills and is trying to make it just like you, then that’s childish. You should want a man who is financially stable or at least on his way to being that way, but does he really have to be rolling in cash for you to give a guy the time of day? We are all entitled to our preferences, but if a man’s shoes send the “broke” signal to your brain and you dismiss him immediately, that’s not fair. Get your own money, honey! GROW UP!
April 12, 2012
10:56
Signs that you are still a girl, not yet a woman!
» ‎ Muchene

One can only wonder what Britney Spears meant with that whole, “I’m not a girl, not yet a woman.” Then what exactly are you Brit? I will tell you what you are…high on drugs! Well, as for our Kenyan ladies we can always safely place them in one of the two categories. Here is how you know that you are still a girl, not yet a woman:

You have violent fits

Who doesn’t go somewhere from time to time, have a run in with an immature chic and want to slap the crap out of them them for talking and looking at you crazy? Been there, but I haven’t done that. Just because someone tests your nerves or is annoying doesn’t mean you have to always be ready to jump. And don’t try and bring your girls into the messy mix when things go bad, because your drama, especially the kind that involves reckless violence, should involve and be handled by you and no one else. However, if someone makes the dumb decision to put their hands on you for no reason…well, a “lady” has to do what she’s got to do. But otherwise, be the bigger person and walk away from foolishness and a possible black eye.

You Keep Going for the SAME Kind of No-Good Dude

It’s crazy how some girls often don’t want to listen to the people who have their best interests at heart when it comes to no-good men, but they want you to listen to them when they come around crying all the time about him. And while you might think it’s cute to go on your Facebook rants about how “You are putting that brother to the left,” and that “I”M DONE WITH THAT CRAP” you find yourself back with that fool, or a guy that’s his prototype: he doesn’t treat you right, he’s low-key cheating A-hole. He’s pretty much the guy from our “How you know you are not a grown man” list. If you keep falling for the same kind of guy or the same kind of foolishness, then you’re no longer falling, but you’re voluntarily walking into a disaster. GROW UP!

You can’t control your Temper

So somebody stepped on your foot by accident, or took the seat you wanted on the bus. You can be a bit pissy about it, but if you go on psycho mode immediately and have a response that’s filled with rage and foolishness, it’s clear you’re a big ‘ol crybaby having a temper tantrum. This type of lady gets bent out of shape over the most inconsequential stuff and can end up messing up everybody’s day. Get a grip, some anger management perhaps. Life’s going to get hard, but there’s no need to have a Lucy Kibaki “Who is your mother” moment every time. GROW UP!

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March 27, 2012
23:43
Tero accuses DJ John Rabar of sexual harrassment!
» ‎ Muchene

  They've been rumours flying about over the reason Tero is no longer at Homeboyz, one of which claims her mum married her off to some prophet, Arunga-style. But Tero has come out and says she quit Homeboyz radio 'cause John Rabar was asking for sexual favours. She used her Facebook page.
“I left HBR coz of the rabar brothers Dj john rabar who is the ceo of homeboyz was demanding sexual favours from me,..it is after this when Homeboyz was bought by Henry kosgei which led to the closure of uptown 91.1fm."
Still no comment from John Rabar on the allegation. But if the storo on Tero's Arunga-style marriage is true, then Rabar need not worry. Tero is married to a certain Hebron Kisamo, a Tanzanian prophet from Cavalry Temple of Arusha. The Kenyan Daily Post broke the story of how her mother gave Tero away to the daughter since he was the 'perfect husband'.
Why is the hottest ones are the most psysho?! Looks like we've lost another one. {plusone}
14:41
What do men want in a woman???
» ‎ Muchene

Every man has a different wish list. But most men have a few basics that they want in a partner and the more qualities you have, the more likely you are to attract the right guy and be able to hold his attention. So here are the secrets to knowing what men want:

LEARN HOW TO COOK - You might not take this seriously if you believe that all these fast food areas coming up especially in Nairobi, that it means men eat out all the time. Maybe, but men also want to be able to stay home and have a home cooked meal. They want their woman to be able to cook for friends and business associates. They want traditional food, a Christmas meal during Christmas, an Easter meal with close friends or family. Ordering in or going out to dinner gets tiring after a while and a man wants to be able to enjoy his own home. If you can't cook, get yourself a beginner cookbook, or take a class and learn. There's no excuse for not knowing how to use an oven or follow a recipe. Not to be a chauvinist here but inability to cook reflects poorly on your womanhood –that is how guys see it.

BE ABLE TO GET ALONG WITH ALL KINDS OF PEOPLE - Do you genuinely like people? Can you walk into a room full of strangers and find something of interest to talk about? If you can not do these things, learn. Read the book by Dale Carnegie, "How to Win Friends and Influence People." It's a great way to learn how to get along with others, even if you don't think alike. Meeting and enjoying the company of strangers is an important trait if you are planning on dating a man for the long haul. Why? Because so much of what they do involves people. Social events are a staple in a man's world. Be it charity events, business dinners, or relaxing with friends, you will be expected to socialize with people of different ages and backgrounds than you. Not only must you have the gift of delightful conversation and the ability to put strangers at ease, your manners must be impeccable. If you're not sure about your manners, get an updated etiquette book and read it from cover to cover such as Etiquette For Dummies by Sue Fox (I kid you not, look for that book on amazon). If you can't get along with the people in a man's life, you will be seen as a barrier rather than an asset. If you are friendly and other people are easily drawn to you, he will be drawn to you, too.

TAKE AN INTEREST IN HIS HOBBIES AND BE WILLING TO TRY NEW THINGS - Men love their hobbies whether its basketball, fishing or playing video games, and they want you to love what they love. Instead of sitting on the sidelines looking bored, a healthy attitude for life is necessary when dating a man you want to keep. You must be willing to try new foods, go to new countries, meet people of different cultures and learn other languages. A love of learning is necessary to keep your mind fresh and him interested in you.

YOU'LL NEED TO HAVE PATIENCE AND TOLERANCE - If you are not a patient person, don't think about dating for now. Men often put themselves first, their means of a living second and their women third (especially at the beginning of a relationship). You might come first for a few weeks, but after a while, other priorities will take over. If you don't believe this, you're in for a big disappointment. If he's late for your dates, takes phone calls that interrupt your intimate dinners and your alone time, you'll have to understand. Men usually have several things going on in their lives at one time. If you cannot tolerate his obnoxious business associate who hustles you, his clients who come first, or his busy work and social calendar, then you are not the kind of person who should consider dating a man who is a KEEPER. Just relegate yourself to the a-holes walking down Nairobi streets!

BE GRATEFUL AT ALL TIMES - No matter what he does for you, be grateful. The smallest gesture should be noticed and appreciated. One of the biggest mistakes you can make is expecting a lot from a man, but in turn appreciating little. Men are very receptive to gratitude you have no idea. A woman who knows the value of a “Thank you” is carried above all others. It costs you nothing to be appreciative but you stand to gain everything…so why not make it a habit and you will see how well your man responds to you.

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March 13, 2012
12:38
Young Parents Alert! You’re Killing your kids!
» ‎ Muchene

As of late, it seems like I’ve been having many conversations related to the tendency of Kenyan Parents – especially of humble background – to come up with grammatical hybrids of names masquerading as creative expression. I’ve heard a small band of defenders explain that it’s a display of our cultural eccentricities and creativity that reveal names that sound like tropical diseases.

Being creative is cool, but I think we’ve come to a point where you Kenyans have gone too far with the names you’re choosing for your children. And just in case you want to criticize muchene for interfering with your baby naming ceremony, here are why these damn names can be a big problem:

Pointless creativity: Coming up with names that run in the family or stand for something deep is one thing; subverting them as a result of trying to be “unique” is just wrong. Changing a perfectly classic name like Alexander and using the short form of it “Alex” for your daughter is just bad! And it is Maxine, I never want my son talking to a girl called “Max”

Biblical idiocracy: I am sorry but naming your kid Bartholomew in the 21^st Century should be a sin punishable by death. Just how many beatings do you want to subject the lil’ guy to. Why in Christ’s name (no pun intended) would you name your kid Lazarus??? Get serious. Names likes Mark, Luke, Mathew are perfectly acceptable biblical names if you are feeling so Christian. There are better ways to express your strong Christian faith…like helping the poor, donating time and money to worthy causes, but making your child a modern day joke with a name like Eliphas is cruel and uncalled for.

They need to be employed someday: Every now and again, I come across really weird names; what person in their free-thinking mind would come up with the name “Cleophus,” make it legal for the courts and send your child off with the expectation that it won’t be an obstacle in the future? While we would love to assume that individuals aren’t shallow enough to judge a person by their name off the top, I’m sure no one reading this was born last night. It obviously happens. A recent study showed that persons with easy to pronounce names are better liked by superiors in the office. While I am linking names and job performance but by calling your daughter

You don’t want your kids angry with you: You don’t want them to feel the need to run and get their name changed the minute they turn 18 do you? What’s wrong with “Andrew”? Is there a problem with “Tracy”? Hell, if you wanna go cultural, run with no Christian names and just stick with cultural names! But there’s no accounting for “Felicitas” or some such name that will take your kids through hell on the playground. Some kids can be truly harsh (damn near evil) by nature, and those names are like giving them a handful of rocks aimed directly at your child.

Don’t put absurd expectations on your child through their name: “Diamond.” “Essence.” “Precious.” “Heaven.” “Princess.” Not made-up names, but your daughter could be the second coming of Halle Berry in her prime. And if she doesn’t end up looking like a “Diamond,” then you have got a lot of explaining to do. Plus, it’s hard to have a name like “Joy” if this young lady has an attitude more suited for a name like “Vicious.” Just keep these things in mind…

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2:23
Kenyan out to get record for most women kissed.
» ‎ Muchene

  John Telewa is a man on a mission. He plans to get into the Guinness Book of Records for the record of kissing the most women on FB. For now, the man has 'kissed' over 400 women, including some celebs like Avril, Caroline Mutoko, Tanya of Tahidi High and Wahu. He's already been branded as 'the kiss bandit' and he aims at kissing one million women in 3 years. Sounds kidogo mad, but Telewa is giving it a positive spin.
“I am trying to do this to show a good example to other young people , by spinning it to a positive thing. This will put Kenyaon the world map. At an early age, I knew that I wanted to make a mark. I just did not know that it would be by kissing women. But, it totally is! I kissed a judge at the Big Brother auditions this past week, it was amazing!”
Go on and give the guy a smooch. Click on the link to get to his Facebook fanpage. {plusone}
March 12, 2012
11:29
CNN humbled by Kenyans on Twitter
» ‎ Muchene

Pissed of Kenyans on Twitter and FB vented their rage at CNN for airing a misleading story about the grenade attacks on Saturday. CNN hyped the story as 'Violence in Kenya' and made it appear that Kenya was spiralling into a Mogadishu of sorts. The graphics and video that CNN used in its broadcast portrayed a country that has been overrun by violence and not as a victim of a terrorist attack.
#SomeoneTellCNN become a trending topic on twitter with Kenyans blasting CNN for its errors, especially when airing stories on Africa. Eventually CNN couldn't ignore the social media onslaught, and they were forced to pull the video along with an apology from their Nairobi correspondent, David Mackenzie.
“Our reporting last night was accurate, the banner used in the bulletin was not. I contacted CNN for future bulletins. Apologies to all.. We’re having the offending video pulled. Again apologies for the mistake. It was changed on air, but not online"
Even Kalonzo Musyoka took to twitter on the issue,
Kalonzo Musyoka @skmusyoka
It is extremely irresponsible for CNN to paint Kenya as a nation in chaos while we are victims of terror. #SomeoneTellCNN Seriously, someone really needed to tell CNN!
March 07, 2012
9:52
South by South West Musical festival
» ‎ Muchene

This weekend you can catch our very own Kenyan bands Sauti Sol and Just A Band in Austin, Texas who will be taking part in the South by South West Musical festival (SXSW). They will be performing the week of March 13-18. With two albums, Sol Filosofia (2011) and Mwanzo (2008), Sauti Sol will bringing the house down. SXSW, in its 26th year running, is an annual music festival that features over 2,000 acts from about 60 countries all around the world. The festival encompasses music, film and interactive. {plusone}
9:20
Nairobi Fashion Week
» ‎ Muchene

The Nairobi Fashion Market is on this weekend - 10th and 11th March 2012 at the Impala Club grounds. Nairobi Fashion Market is the original shopping market and largest outdoor retail event in Nairobi, that offers ultimate outdoor shopping experience, and brings together, over 60 top fashion designers and retailers. Saturday entertainment extends till 8.30p.m for a hot lingerie show by Simpli Pretti, and a performance by Aaron Rimbui & The Trio. {plusone}
March 06, 2012
8:48
Prostitution: To Legalize or not?
» ‎ Muchene

It is business having pleasure with you! That is the mantra of a commercial sex worker in the city of Nairobi. Recently there were rumours that Kenya may go the Dutch rout and legalize the oldest trade in the world. Many of you were already dreaming of Red Light districts all over the city before the mayor dashed your hopes.

Nairobi Mayor George Aladwa announced that the council will continue carrying out a crackdown on prostitutes as it awaits recommendations of a committee formed last week to look into their grievances. The committee according to Aladwa has two weeks to submit its report which will inform the council on ways of handling the matter.

The mayor, George Aladwa, had announced that among the measures the council was likely to take was designating red light zones for the commercial sex workers to ply their trade.

What do you think…
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March 02, 2012
11:35
Things not so 'POA' for Tuju and his wife
» ‎ Muchene

Party Chairman for the Party of Action (POA) Rapheal Tuju, seems to be having major issues in his own home, with his wife allegedly caught in an affair that ended in kidnap and attempted murder charges against her.
Click on the link to get the full vibe. Shocking!!! {plusone}
9:16
Reasons you should NOT move in together
» ‎ Muchene

There are many reasons you should not move in together, some of which muchene gave you just the other day. But for you who are not yet fully convinced, here are some more reasons moving in might not be the sharpest idea you ever came up with:

You’ll want alone time

If you live with anyone—roommates or boyfriend—you don’t get that much needed alone time easily. You will have to make a point of saying “I want to go on a walk, alone” and he will have to learn to say the same to you. But you both have to learn to not get offended. It can feel overwhelming to be with anyone 24/7 and never just be alone with your thoughts. Now, can you imagine he decides he wants to spend an entire weekend with friends and does not want to see you till Monday. I mean is he serious? A whole weekend? Those are the weekends you spend reflecting on whether your relationship is worth all the effort and when he comes back home on Monday he is met with the “where is this relationship going” talk on the couch.

You’ll miss each other more than ever ironically

You may want your occasional alone time, but when the two of you are apart for a few days or even a few hours, you may feel the separation even more. A couple develops a very deep bond the more time they spend together, and you might start feeling out of place when you go places without each other. It is the most bizarre irony. Before when you were on your own you would look forward to the weekend to see your guy. Now that you live together if he does not join you for dinner on a Thursday night it feels like you are the loneliest person in the world. I mean you now live together after all, you should not have to endure boyfriend-cravings when you share a home. So close yet so far- how Ironic!

You’ll naturally become more jealous

Before, if you called your man and asked him to do something, but he had other plans, that was no problem. But now, if he goes out with friends, and leaves you at home, it becomes more apparent that those are the nights he has chosen to do something other than be with you. You never looked at it that way when you didn’t live together—that he was consciously choosing to be away from you. But when you share a home, and you’re sitting alone on the couch when he could have easily invited you to join him, you’ll notice it more than ever. That being said, it’s not his obligation to invite you along every time. He needs his own life. It’s just hurtful a bit when he openly decides not to be with you given what you feel for him.

Power struggles in the nyumba

Inevitably, one of you will be better at paying bills on time, better at cleaning the house, better at remembering to pick up things for the house and that person will feel a bit like a “parent” figure. It will be a delicate balance to keep—to feel that you are still equals and both grown-ups when one of you is constantly nagging the other to do something for the home. It is often said that married men are just big babies- they can’t even clean after themselves. And your man may not be the most grown-up person when it comes to kumbukaing to lipa things like the elec bill. Imagine you kuja digz and you pata him sitting at the dinner table in candle light- you imagine he has finally found his romantic side, and then as your heart skips and jumps in joy he drops the “Babe, I sahaud to lipa the power bill si you can pitia Kenya Power kesho.”At that point, if you had never felt like grabbing a mwiko and chapaing a grown man, how you will miraculously be patwad by the neighbours smacking the crap out of your dude will shock your system!

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March 01, 2012
12:52
Africa’s Gays running to Kenya
» ‎ Muchene

Remember that infamous Ugandan Gay couple, John and Paul? The ones that kept getting death threats if they did not straighten up their act- pun intended! If you do then you might be passing them by at the mall or the supermarket some time soon. We just learned that the couple has been in Nairobi since May of last year.

You see, all was well for gays in Uganda until an anti-homosexuality bill caused a wave of homophobia in Uganda. John and Paul could no longer hold hands in the streets of the capital Kampala and kiss in night clubs and more nightmare crept in when people began insulting and assaulting gays and they had to run away to Kenya.

In December, President Barack Obama said that fighting discrimination against gays should be at the forefront of American diplomacy. In Kampala, people did not know gays existed until a member of parliament in 2009 proposed strengthening the law against homosexuality, which could already lead to a life sentence in prison. Many Ugandans demonstrated against gay people and sighted that they are not human beings to an extent that they could not buy from shopkeepers!

Worse was to come when a screaming tabloid headline encouraged its readers to “HANG” homosexuals and in October 2010 published the names, photos and addresses of more than 20 gays.

Now, just like Somali refugees come to Dadaab, Ugandan Gay refugees are being hosted by none other than the one country that hosts all our neighbours’ problems. Kenya is fast gaining a reputation as a Gay Haven. The country has a number of Gay rights organizations that Africans are using to seek refuge in Kenya. Perhaps we should embrace GAY Tourism!

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February 28, 2012
8:09
Did you know...ARVs could turn you into a woman?!
» ‎ Muchene

This is a disturbing story for East African men, coming straight off the Nyeri battering sagas. Some Tanzanian men on anti-retroviral (ARV) drugs have experienced abnormal breast enlargement similar to that of women.

Joseph Mkanda, 43, one of the victims, said he developed strange symptoms plus growing breasts after taking the drugs. Initially, he suspected the cause to be lack of a balanced diet. But he soon realised that the main problem was the drugs he was taking.

“I feel very much ashamed to go out of my house, because I have developed breasts like a woman. …I fear that other people would laugh at me,” he said from his Mtwara-base.

Pole sana Bwana Mkanda.
February 24, 2012
15:22
Ruto's URP website hacked on day 1!
» ‎ Muchene

Presidential hopeful Will.i.am Ruto, launched his website with much pomp and fanfare on Wednesday. It was an important milestone for Ruto, who is trying to identify with the youthful electorate, even branding himself as 'The Hustler'. But the website got hacked, with the Hacker leaving a valuable tip for Ruto on the site.
YOU SHOULD BAFF YOUR SECURITY BEFORE LAUNCHING YOUR WEBSITE!!!
AM A PATRIOTIC KENYAN, ALL YOUR DATA IS SAFE BUT YOUR WEB IS HACKED!!!
********************************SECURITY HANDLER – “AMOR” *************************************
Any bets on Raila getting fingered as the hacker?! Anyway, the website looks to be up and running for now and you can check it for yourself. Click here to check Ruto's website.
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9:48
Njenga Karume is dead
» ‎ Muchene

Another veteran in Kenya politics has passed away this week. Njenga Karume died this morning at Karen Hospital, where he was undergoing treatment for prostate cancer. His death follows just days after the death of John Michuki, who died on Tuesday.
President Kibaki sent a message of condolence for the "death of his dear friend".
“We thank God for the great moment we shared with a fine gentleman and political ally that Karume was to me and my family, and political associates and followers.”
Rest in Peace. {plusone}
February 22, 2012
2:43
Louis otieno clears the air over Chepchumba's death
» ‎ Muchene

  Louis Otieno called for a press-briefing yesterday to clear the air on the saga on the slain Careen Chepchumba. With reknowned lawyer Phillip Murgor by his side, Louis said he was not and never was in hiding as had been claimed, and that Careen Chepchumba was a dear 'friend' whose parents 'violently opposed' their friendship.
Here's the transcript of most of the briefing.
Louis Otieno: My attention has been drawn to various media articles regarding the unfortunate death of a friend, Careen. The articles unfortunately have suggested that I am wanted or being sought by the police as a suspect. In addition, the articles have suggested that I am on the run, which is absolutly false. The effect of the articles (pause) ...is an effect of causing aspersions on my reputation, for which I am presently seeking legal advice with a view to taking appropriate action. The fact is that, following the unfortunate demise of Careen, a number of persons all of whom knew the deceased in one way or another, have been contacted by the police to determine whether or not they have useful information regarding the incident. I confirm that I have been in touch with the police at Kilimani Police Station on several occasions, as is the case with several other persons and I am certain that I will be cleared of any wrong-doing or event that could have lent to the unfortunate death of Careen. Finally, I would like to assure the Kenyan public that I am totally innocent and that I have no doubt that I will be vindicated at the end of the investigations.   Louis: A lot of things will come out after the investigations, and a lot of things that are being discussed now... I have to be careful not to jeopardise the investigation, but our friendship in the way that she was friends with me was violently resisted by her parents. Alright. It was violently resisted by her parents and that is one of the issues where she was seeking help.
Louis: Her parents beat her up. The did. Not once, not twice...and it was an issue and we did seek intervention about this, the violence that was meted out on her. We did seek assistance, we did seek intervention on it.
Journalist: Where did you seek assistance?
Louis: We went to a family friend. We saw them. Two times we had the meetings with them. We went to their residence and after that, my advice to Careen was it is best to start documenting all these incidents. It is best that when you see the doctor, when you go there for assistance, have it documented, have it recorded so that there can be a history of what is going on.
Journalist: Did you ever meet the parents?
Louis: By meet, do you mean did we ever have a sit-down or do I know them?
Journalist: Yaa. Did they confront you? Louis: They never spoke to me directly on the issue. What the father would do is that he would write letters and bring them...he'd write stuff and tell her 'go show him this', you know, saying that you would not be his friend, you will have nothing to do with him, and of course she would say she cannot sign such a letter and that would bring about a whole new episode of violence.
Journalist: At any one time did you ever go to the police?
Louis: Well, there're certain incidents which we have reported on, and certain incidents that we've had discussions on, and yes... I don't want to go into that because they're looking into them.
Journalist: He's talked of documenting part of the problems she was undergoing and that part of the communication we learn she documented was that Louis Otieno or L.O., which implies Louis Otieno, was harrassing her.
Murgor (Louis' lawyer): I think I saw that in one of the media articles and it is one of the things that the police are looking into... whether or not it is a document that emanates from him or her or any third party. Those are the kind of things we'd like to sort of not comment specifically on.
Journalist: We just want him to tell us whether he was harrassing her in anyway.
Murgor: Okay, that's a good one.
Louis: I was her friend... I was her friend, and if there was any issue of harrassment, why would it be in a single note? There would have been a history of that.There would have been a history of notes or letters of protest or harrassment, and probably even, in the same manner I am saying, it is good to record those things and have them documented. She then would have done the same if that was the issue. So this single allegation of harrassment, I am not clear. I am not clear what it is about and as you have been told, it is being investigated.
Louis: How can I be on the run when you can confirm from the police that I have been there from the date of this incident...I have been there on several times... of my own volition by the way. I have not had any harrassment, or I have not been held by the police at any one time. I have not been picked up by the police at any one time, and I have been seen. There're those who can see me now, and as they're watching me now, they know they have seen me in public places. I have been driving in Nairobi traffic. I've been to the airport, I've been to the malls. How is it possible to be so visible and yet to be on the run?
Journalist: Do you regard yourself as a suspect or a witness?
Louis: (Shakes head) All I know is, I lost a friend... and I as much as the next person, I'd like to know what happened to her.
Journalist: Do you have information which could help the police get the killers?
Louis: If I had anything, it is the police I would tell.
Journalist: But the fact that police have taken DNA samples and have taken you for questioning... (not clear) ...would be in bad taste if I referred to you as a suspect?
Louis: Of course it would be in bad taste. I did that because I was cooperating. It was part of my cooperation. In all my visits to the police station, I have gone unaccompanied. This is the first time I am sitting next to legal counsel. Alright. I've been there by myself and each time I've been there, I've been able to go in and leave after a discussion (not clear). Police suggested to me this could be a scientific way to absolve you, to clear you, to say definitely, that you were not present, which is why I volunteered to do it. I could have done something else and said, am I suspect, I don't want to do this, but because I am driven by the fact that I am innocent, and I am driven by the fact that I would like to know the truth.
Journalist: How would you describe yourself as a person?
Louis: (Rolls eyes at this question. Even Muchene's eyes rolled at this question! Kwani, what street colleges are our journalists coming from?!)
Murgor: In what way? More specific.
Journalist: (mumbles)
Louis: I didn't hear that.
Journalist: Are you violent?
Louis: (shaking his head) I have no history of violence...ever! From school, from growing up to my adult age, I do not have a history of violence.
If you want to watch the press conference, check it at the Capital FM youtube feed at this link. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iDUf4W3GjSE&feature=player_embedded {plusone}
February 17, 2012
8:43
Dating habits you need to drop!
» ‎ Muchene

Ladies, it will hurt me a lot more than you to say this- not really but I will pretend. Being an overgrown child is not sexy! There I said it. Here are some dating habits to break by the time you turn 30, gathered from our wise muchene peeps:

1. Borrowing money from your parents: no grown up woman will want to take money from their folks if they are making their own. So, a tendency to run to mommy and daddy when things get a bit hard can only be a result of a lack of skills to implement your independence or a refusal to grow the hell up and be independent! You will find that as a dependent, childish 30 year old woman you will be in a class of your own.

2. Making out with your BFFs at bars for attention: this habit ought to be banned. Much like smoking at clubs, there should be a “No Kissing girls if you are one” section. If you think it is attractive to kiss your best friend at 30 to get people to notice you is ok…

3. Making out with your boyfriend at bars for attention: His place, your place, hotel room, lodgo…any one of those areas is quite fine to get your sexy on but not in a public place. Not when you are at an age where better is expected of you. Leave this habit to the teenagers at Red Tape!

4. Carrying a torch for anyone you haven't seen in the last five years: Why? Why should a grown woman still be attached to someone who ditched her kitambo for a blonde chic with bigger boobs?! GROW UP!

5. Declaring an entire gender "all dogs": With this attitude you are sure to be single, lonely, desperate and chairperson of FIDA by the time you are 35! I am kidding about the FIDA bit btw…I do not want a rally outside muchene offices! More men cheat than women, so that makes them all dogs? Well, over 90% of all prostitutes in Kenya are female…can we apply the same argument. Stop complaining about you dating losers and go get yourself a real man…other Kenyan women are doing it why can’t you?!

6. Skipping regular gyno exams: If you do not have the discipline to honour gynecologist appointments, then what will stop you from skipping pre-natal check-ups?! “I feel fine and I haven’t been sleeping around” is not a medical prognosis! Get yourself checked regularly, it’s not only the right and mature thing to do but it may also save you a life threatening condition.

7. Having a crush on Justin Bieber: if you did not have a happy childhood, get over yourself!

{jcomments on}
February 13, 2012
13:46
Jay Z and Beyonce trademark their mtoto!
» ‎ Muchene

Wondering what kind of parents Beyonce and Jay-Z are? Strict? Care-free? Disciplinarians? Well not quite but try, overprotective.

At least when it comes to ownership of daughter Blue Ivy's name. Hey, if you like it, then you shoulda put a trademark on it.

Why? Well, the proud mom and dad hadn't even spent three weeks in their new parenting roles before they saw fit to file paperwork with the U.S. Patent and Trademark office seeking to protect the good (and potentially lucrative) name of their baby girl.

So that’s right, all you Kenyans who were going to fungua a club called Baby Ivy, washana nayo! I wonder if Kenyan celeb paroz will take the cue from this….Nameless and Wahu we are watching.
February 10, 2012
8:11
MTV Shuga Premiere
» ‎ Muchene

It’s going down today! Drum rolls please..... The Shuga: Love, Sex, Money Premieres today Friday 10th February 2012 at the Nairobi National Museum. What is Shuga? those of you who leave outside Kenya may be asking... Well the MTV shuga site states- Shuga: Love, Sex, Money is the much anticipated sequel to smash-hit MTV series, Shuga; a drama centred around sex and relationships among youth in Nairobi. The second series is bigger and better than ever – with seven 30 minutes episode that tackle issues relevant to young Kenyans, such as relationships based on gifts for sex, Rape and using power or authority to force someone to have sex with you, homosexuality, sex with multiple partners, HIV testing and Living Positively With HIV. There are tickets to be won by telling your very own #ThatShugaMoment. #ThatShugaMoment is a moment when YOU are required to make a split second decision around sex, relationships, condom use, or any other situations relevant to the Shuga dramas. Make sure you mention @MTVShuga on Twitter or post it on the Shuga facebook page. {plusone}
0:06
50 cent doing charity work in Kenya
» ‎ Muchene

Word went round that a certain mega star had touched down hapa nchi yetu Kenya incognito kabisa! Well that rapper is none other than 50 cent who by the way made a cool $ 5.5 million dollars betting on the New York giants winning the NFC championship and the super bowl. Dude wasn’t here to roga roga Kenyan’s with his songs but to do charity work. 50 is teaming up with the World Food Program to see firsthand the effects of hunger in Somalia and Kenya. He will be donating to WFP 10 cents from every sale of a new energy drink called Street King that he is promoting. {plusone}
February 09, 2012
0:16
Oliver Litondo wins Best Actor for The First Grader
» ‎ Muchene

The First Grader lead actor, Oliver Litondo, won Best Actor honouree at the Annual Movies for Grownups Awards. True, Muchene also has never heard of those awards, but they must be something, cause Litondo shared the stage with Martin Scorsese, Meryl Streep and Sharon Stone. Even more amazing was that Oliver got a standing ovation rather than polite applause when he went up for his award. Litondo was humbled by the award and in accepting his award, he called for film-makers to make more movies in Kenya. He's also up for the Outstanding Actor in a Motion Picture award from the NAACP awards to be held on Feb 17th.
The First Grader will finally hit Kenyan big screens this month...about 2 years too late. The movie will be at the theatres on February 24th. Check out the trailer in case you haven't watched it yet.
{youtube}ns030fCDorE {/youtube} {plusone}
February 07, 2012
11:46
Smart TV goes under!
» ‎ Muchene

  Looks like the Pay-TV, Smart TV, had a not-so-smart strategy as they're closing up shop. Smart TV hit the Kenyan market hard with their "Are you ready for 2012" marketing campaign, referring to the switch from analogue to digital broadcasting in 2012. Well, Smart TV themselves weren't ready for 2012 and have gone off air. They've hardly been operational for a year and have already joined GTV in the forgotten archives.
Smart TV has been off air for a week now, and calls to their offices are going unanswered. It's been reported that their Swedish investors have bailed on them and for now, no-one seems willing to take them up. The directors of the company are to meet this Friday to decide if subscribers will be refunded the 5k they spent to buy the decorders and the subscribers payment for Jan.
Muchene hears champagne glasses clinking at DSTV over the demise of Smart TV, and sure they're just waiting for Zuku TV to roll over dead. But methinks Mr Bell at Zuku just might be here to stay for a long time. You've got to respect the man who wears a skirt in public!  {plusone}
February 04, 2012
15:23
Man or Machine
» ‎ Muchene

It was all excitement when Daniel Adongo younger brother to (Leon Adongo who plays for the Kenya 7s team ) joined the Vodacom Bulls late last year. Lakini if you look at the kind of training his going through, you realize how hard you have to train to get to the top.
Bio:Physical: 1.97m, 112kgBorn: 12.10.1989, Nairobi
Squads: Kenya u.19 & u.21Natal u.19 & u.21Sharks XV (Vodacom Cup)Sharks Currie CupSharks Super Rugby
15:17
Kenya 7s Team back to winning ways
» ‎ Muchene

Finally the Kenya 7s team is showing signs of recovery after beating Australia 12-7 to lift the Bowl title in Wellington, New Zealand. Mitch AKA Modjo can now breathe a sigh of relief after all the bashing Kenyans have given him following the dismal performance of the team in their previous outings.

I reckon this team with coach Modjo are going to go far. Its boiling under and it is only a matter of time before they upset the big boys.

{youtube}v65CIRNJfX0(/youtube}
February 02, 2012
9:50
Celebs na magari zao!
» ‎ Muchene

So Jaguar tops the car charts on the Kenyan celeb scene with his all white Range Rover Vogue with his jina on the plates- big up Jaguar, umevuka border!

Lagging behind are a few others who have not done badly at all. Namelss is big pimping in his BMW X5 and his lovely wife Wahu is cruising in a Mercedes C-Class.

But the king of them all in Africa is D’Banj who recently purchased an Aston Martin! Hebu muone...
January 26, 2012
9:18
"Nice Guys" Always Willing but Always Losers!
» ‎ Muchene

Well, we’ve already onad some of the reasons why women seem to discard nice guys. And btw, if you are a nice guy, well there is the good news and the bad news. The bad news is that there are more mistakes you’ve been making with women, thus your miserable track record at dating. The good news is that muchene is here to tell you where you have bee going wrong.

Here are MORE of the common “nice guy” mistakes:

Not “Getting” How Attraction Works For Women

Women are VERY different from men when it comes to ATTRACTION. You need to accept this fact, and deal with it.

When a man sees a beautiful, young, sexy woman, he INSTANTLY feels a sexual attraction. But does the same apply for women? Do women feel sexual attraction to men based mostly on looks? Or is something else going on?

Well, you should know that women usually have their "attraction mechanisms" triggered by things OTHER than looks. Have you ever noticed that you see a lot more average and unattractive men with beautiful women than the other way around?

Think about it. And it’s not just the money factor. Women are more attracted to certain qualities in men... and they are attracted to the way a man makes them FEEL perhaps more than how they look. If you know how to use your body language and communication correctly, you can make women feel the same kind of powerful sexual attraction to you that YOU feel when you see a hot, sexy young woman.

Thinking That Only Money And Looks will get you there

One of the most common mistakes that nice guys make is giving up before they've even gotten started... because they think that attractive women are only interested in men who have looks and money... or guys who are a certain height... or guys who are a certain age.

And sure, there are some women who are only interested in these things. But MOST women are far more interested in a man's personality than his wallet or his looks. Granted, Kenyan sistaz are leaning towards wallet romance but still there a lot of women out there that value personality traits in a guy that attract her like a magnet...

And if you learn what they are and how to use them, YOU can be one of these guys. YOU DO NOT have to "settle" for a woman just because you aren't rich, tall, or handsome.

Let me say this again: If you know how to use your body language and communication correctly, you can make women feel the same kind of powerful sexual attraction to you that YOU feel when you see a hot, sexy young woman.

Giving Away All Of Your Power To Women

Earlier I mentioned that it's a mistake to look to a woman for approval or permission. Well, another similar tactic that a lot of nice guys use is GIVING AWAY THEIR POWER to women.

Said differently, nice guys try to get women to like them by doing whatever the woman wants.

Another bad idea...Women are NEVER attracted to men that they can walk all over... Women aren't attracted to Wussies!

Not Knowing EXACTLY What To Do In Each Type Of Situation With Women

Now I'm going to blow your mind...A woman ALWAYS knows what you're thinking. Women are approximately TEN TIMES better than men at reading body language. That's ten TIMES. I know, it might be hard to believe. But for example, if you're out alone with a woman, and you want to kiss her, she knows it.

And if you don't know exactly what to do and exactly HOW to kiss her, and you just sit there looking at her and getting nervous, she won't help! Hakuna 911 hapo dadi! And this goes for ALL aspects of women and dating...Approaching a woman, getting her number, asking her out, kissing her, getting physical... everything.

If you don't know what to do in each situation, you will probably screw it up... and LOSE EVERYTHING. And you KNOW it. It is VITALLY important that you know EXACTLY how to go from one step to the next with a woman... from the first meeting, all the way to the bedroom.

I know, it’s a handful, but there is only one way that you would get yourself into this bracket guys….and this is the next point

Not Getting HELP

This is the biggest mistake of all. This is the mistake that keeps most nice guys from EVER having the kind of success with women that they truly want. I know, all guys, even nice ones, don't like to make themselves look weak or helpless.

Asking for help might save you a lot of heartbreak and wasted opportunities in the future! Kuuliza sio ujinga.
January 17, 2012
9:14
New Chinese station poaches entire KTN, K24 & NTV line-up!
» ‎ Muchene

Dennis Onsarigo and Mohamed Ali could be headed out of Kenya Television Network. KTN is struggling to reclaim its lost glory after being left high and dry by some of its most experienced technicians and journalists to new kid on the block, CCTV.

NTV business reporters Larry Madowo and Kaara Wainaina are resigning from the Nation Media Group, joining a list of other journalists from the ailing station in a mass talent exodus. Wainaina, a CNN African Journalist of the Year award winner and Madowo, a soft- spoken, self-styled social media guru, have been frustrated by business editor Wallace Kantai, they said.

The move is expected the heap unsustainable pressure on the television channel reputed for letting its leading lights go. Sources said the two journalist’s alleged frustration at the hands of Wallace Kantai stem from the fact that the pint-sized editor has limited grasp of business reporting. Or maybe the Chinese are just simply splashing more money at the two!

The development comes just days after NTV trio Peninah Karibe, Mark Masai and Jane Keiyo left for CCTV. They join Ken Mijungu, Carol Gatura of the Konnekt show fame, and Koffa Mrenje who all decamped from the struggling K24. Despite the exodus, officials said NTV has enough funds to recruit others.

Al-Jazeera and CCTV broadcasters are recruiting staff members in a major expansion offensive set to upset the operations of some of Kenya's leading media outlets. Some local players have been compelled to initiate consultations with their staff in a bid to forestall imminent departure. Kenyan journalists have applied for various positions at moneyed CCTV and Al-Jazeera, with the hope of better pay, working conditions and experience.

Qatari-funded Al-Jazeera is starting a Satellite Swahili channel to be based in Nairobi and whose audience is Swahili-Speaking east Africa, while CCTV is seeking to expand its operations, in what does not appear much of business and news agenda. The two stations have been running adverts in Kenyan newspapers in the past few months.
8:14
New Chinese station poaches entire KTN, K24 & NTV line-up!
» ‎ Muchene

Dennis Onsarigo and Mohamed Ali could be headed out of Kenya Television Network. KTN is struggling to reclaim its lost glory after being left high and dry by some of its most experienced technicians and journalists to new kid on the block, CCTV.

NTV business reporters Larry Madowo and Kaara Wainaina are resigning from the Nation Media Group, joining a list of other journalists from the ailing station in a mass talent exodus. Wainaina, a CNN African Journalist of the Year award winner and Madowo, a soft- spoken, self-styled social media guru, have been frustrated by business editor Wallace Kantai, they said.

The move is expected the heap unsustainable pressure on the television channel reputed for letting its leading lights go. Sources said the two journalist’s alleged frustration at the hands of Wallace Kantai stem from the fact that the pint-sized editor has limited grasp of business reporting. Or maybe the Chinese are just simply splashing more money at the two!

The development comes just days after NTV trio Peninah Karibe, Mark Masai and Jane Keiyo left for CCTV. They join Ken Mijungu, Carol Gatura of the Konnekt show fame, and Koffa Mrenje who all decamped from the struggling K24. Despite the exodus, officials said NTV has enough funds to recruit others.

Al-Jazeera and CCTV broadcasters are recruiting staff members in a major expansion offensive set to upset the operations of some of Kenya's leading media outlets. Some local players have been compelled to initiate consultations with their staff in a bid to forestall imminent departure. Kenyan journalists have applied for various positions at moneyed CCTV and Al-Jazeera, with the hope of better pay, working conditions and experience.

Qatari-funded Al-Jazeera is starting a Satellite Swahili channel to be based in Nairobi and whose audience is Swahili-Speaking east Africa, while CCTV is seeking to expand its operations, in what does not appear much of business and news agenda. The two stations have been running adverts in Kenyan newspapers in the past few months.
January 11, 2012
14:33
Esther Arunga back on air to earn 950k per month!!!
» ‎ Muchene

I know you were all touched when Janet Mbugua, madame PYT mwenyewe, rudid on your screens with Citizen TV. The feedback we got from you was overwhelming. Then, you found out that she would earn a cool 803k every month and suddenly the love potead! Most of you could not believe that a pretty face with decent English and no further skills could be pewad a contract ya 803k kila mwezi. Remember what they used to say about lightning striking twice….

Well, the good news is that Esther Arunga will be back on your screens very soon! Very sane and very PYT, just how we like her! Esther is rumoured to have joined the brand new Chinese station in Kenya, CCTV. CCTV reportedly gave her a contract worth 950,000 per month for her to sign on with them!

Well, we are all crazy about this crazy beauty…but that is some crazy money to give someone who just regained her sanity recently! What do you guys think...

{loadposition poll_28}
13:33
Esther Arunga back on air to earn 950k per month!!!
» ‎ Muchene

I know you were all touched when Janet Mbugua, madame PYT mwenyewe, rudid on your screens with Citizen TV. The feedback we got from you was overwhelming. Then, you found out that she would earn a cool 803k every month and suddenly the love potead! Most of you could not believe that a pretty face with decent English and no further skills could be pewad a contract ya 803k kila mwezi. Remember what they used to say about lightning striking twice….

Well, the good news is that Esther Arunga will be back on your screens very soon! Very sane and very PYT, just how we like her! Esther is rumoured to have joined the brand new Chinese station in Kenya, CCTV. CCTV reportedly gave her a contract worth 950,000 per month for her to sign on with them!

Well, we are all crazy about this crazy beauty…but that is some crazy money to give someone who just regained her sanity recently! What do you guys think...

{loadposition poll_28}
January 10, 2012
10:09
Daft Kenyans misbehaving in the USA
» ‎ Muchene

A goat which was headed for another one of those Kenyan-style nyama choma extravaganzas narrowly escaped death when police in Bedford, Virginia arrested a European driver of the car carrying the goat in the trunk. When asked, Fiona Ann Enderdy said she was giving the goat to the four Kenyans who were her passengers in the car.

Unlike in Kenya where it is custom for such things to happen, an animal control officer was also at the scene and said the temperature in the trunk was measured at 95 degrees 10 minutes after the trunk was opened. This was deemed to be an unsuitable environment for a poor mbuzi! The goat was given custody at the Bedford County Pound and a hearing in a few days will determine the animal’s fate. The Kenyans were not charged but the driver was charged with cruelty to animals!

I bet that mlami feels dafter than daft for trusting these unscrupulous people that are called Kenyans!
January 09, 2012
8:56
Model of the Week: Flavia Tumusiime
» ‎ Muchene

Happy New Year People!!!!!! I hope that you guys relaxed like we did at muchene. What a DRINKCEMBER!!!! Anyway, we are back bigger and better than ever. While on holiday one of you came and asked why we only feature models on our “Model of the Week” section. Did you see the heading or are you illiterate?! Anyhowz, what this young chic was getting at is that we should give credit to our very beautiful women who are not models. So, 2012 begins with a non-model beauty that you have all seen on TV hivi majuzi.

She has graced TV screens across East Africa and she has now become a familiar face to those who followed Guinness Football Challenge TV show. Flavia Tumusiime, Uganda's Capital FM AM-PM programme presenter is definitely spicing up the show. Her Juicy look and sweet voice as described by many of her fans has earned her lots of fans and admirers not just in her home country Uganda, but also currently in Kenya and Tanzania.

The 23 year old graduate from Makerere University is a well established TV & Radio personality in Uganda for the last 9 years. An actor, Model, Voice over artist, Radio/TV personality all rolled in one. She has been acting since 2007 and some of the films she has featured in include Kiwaani and Irreversible Regret among others.

Flavia joined the media industry at a tender age of 14 years when she was hosting a Teen's club programme on WBS TV in 2002 until 2006. She joined Hot 100 FM as a Radio host and later moved to Capital FM Uganda where she is currently working.

In August 2011 she was nominated among five other African media personalities to represent Uganda as a Channel O VJ. She is most remembered though for hosting the Guinness Football Challenge show airing across East Africa.

Only one question…what do Ugandan women eat, that diab is wololololololo!!!!
December 22, 2011
1:35
Kenyan guys getting trafficked as sex slaves
» ‎ Muchene

It seems that these Gulf States aren't only taking our women. They're also taking our men... and as sex slaves. There's a Kenyan gay magazine, Identity, and they have exposed male sex trafficking between Kenya, UAE, Qatar and Saudi Arabia. According to the magazine, gay and bi-sexual students in campus are targeted, being promised the usual gold and honey in the Persian Gulf. Kenyatta University seems to be the reaping grounds for these guys, with most of the victims coming from here. Some guy only known as Boniface, is recruiting the guys, with promises of jobs as air hostesses, with victims paying a processing fee of between 1k - 5k. One victim who spoke to Identity Magazine said he was promised a job with Qatar Airways, but on landing was forced to become a sex slave and do some crazy sh*t. "...I was beaten, urinated on and even one time, someone defecated on me." He was lucky enough to escape and tell his story. Qatar has no anti-trafficking laws, and while Kenya has those laws,homo-sexuality is illegal and cause of that, the victims have nowhere to turn too and report the abuse.
This is just crazy!! What do you make of this whole story? {loadposition poll_27} {plusone}
December 20, 2011
9:42
Ranneberger marries his Kenyan chic
» ‎ Muchene

Last weekend was a weekend for weddings. Besides Angela Ndambuki's wedding, former US Ambassador Michael Ranneberger got married to his Kenyan chic, Ruth Konchellah. It was nothing glamourous, as the couple tied the knot at the AG's office on Friday morning. Ranneberger openly declared his love for Konchellah at his farewell ceremony in April, saying he was 'fortunate to become a king to a certain lady'. Konchellah is a charity worker and the couple met when Ranneberger was on official duty in Trans Mara.
All the best to the new couple from Muchene. {plusone}
December 19, 2011
12:52
Top Google searches in 2011 by Kenyans
» ‎ Muchene

Google have released their Zeitgeist for 2011, which is their list of top searches globally. This year's Zeitgeist list Kenya's top 10 lists in sports, entertainment, beauty & personal care, Google News, fastest rising searches and fastest rising people.
In sports, the NBA is no 1. That was a shocker. Didn't know Kenyan's were such fans of Basketball. Second was Arsenal, with Manchester third. One of the rare times Arsenal has beaten Man U at anything. In beauty & personal care, 'hair' topped the list and 'fake hair' aka 'weaves' coming in fourth. The entertainment list was topped by those latin soaps, 'Soy Tu Duena' and the likes. Fastest Rising Person was 'Big Meech' with the fastest rising search being Youtube followed by Arsenal.
Here're the complete top 10 lists for Kenya.
Top Sports1. NBA2. Arsenal3. Manchester United4. Chelsea5. English premier league6. goal.com7. epl news8. soccernet9. neo cricket live10. rugby world cup

Top Google news1. Kenya2. Somalia3. Arsenal4. Manchester United5. Facebook6. Libya7. Daily Nation8. Chelsea9. YouTube10. Standard newspaper
Local top search news1. Kenya news2. BBC3. Latest news4. Breaking news5. Kenya breaking news6. Libya7. KTN8. Gadaffi9. Somalia10. Nairobi now
Top entertainment1. Wake me2. Soy tu Duena3. Teresa Telenovela4. Message riddim5. Big brother amplified6. Les Paul7. Lucero8. Miss World 20119. Vybz Kartel songs10. Nate Dogg
Beauty and personal care 1. Hair2. How to3. Tattoos4. Weaves5. BMI6. Lose7. Excercise8. Beauty9. Weight loss10. ITL
Kenya’s Fastest Rising Searches1. YouTube2. Arsenal3. Daily Nation4. Facebook5. Yahoo6. Gmail7. KRA8. yahoo mail9. hotmail10. couleur 3
Kenya’s Fastest Rising People1. Big Meech2. Steve Jobs3. John Dahlback4. Nicki Minaj5. Rihanna6. Joel Osteen7. Lil Wayne8. Ellen G. White9. Wayne Rooney10. Lewis Nguyai Go to http://www.googlezeitgeist.com for the complete list globally. {plusone}

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